As salamu Alaykum!

Welcome to Day 1 of The Love, Money and Purpose Blueprint
Today, we are going to talk about Mistake #1: Faulty Mindset About Allah.

Specifically:

• The reason professional women absorb harsh beliefs about Allah
• Why rituals then feel empty
• How to reset your lens so practice feels sweet again
  
  

Let’s dive in.

THE MISTAKE: FAULTY MINDSET ABOUT ALLAH

Perfectionism dressed up as piety drains the sweetness out of faith.

Mariam’s eyes were full of hurt. She and I were separated through a screen, but her pain was palpable. She was telling me about her parents she rarely talked to. They were well-meaning, yet over the years they inflicted judgment and criticism that cut deeply. They did not think they were doing anything wrong, which made the problem worse. They expected perfection and nothing else. 

Mariam is not the only one; I’ve heard from so many who have lived with the same pain. 

Our first relationship- the one with are parents, affects everything, including how we view Islam.

We struggle with Islamic practices, feeling like we aren't really getting the point. I too experienced this - equating Islam with rituals alone, while the sweetness described in classical texts felt like an elusive fantasy.

Why does this happen? 

THE REASON THIS HAPPENS 

It all boils down to the way we are taught about Islam. 

The focus is usually on rituals, rules, regulations. Do you wear socks when you pray or not? Is nail polish haram? Can you eat the gel cap supplement? Rushed obligatory prayers motivated by fear and guilt. We are taught all the outward actions, but not how to connect from the heart. We observe those around us go through the motions and often adopt their way too.

The lesson is reinforced with:

• Overly Critical Parents: we all remember the glare we got when we made the wrong move at the masjid. Criticism rains down hard and fast. Not only at the masjid, but in everything we do, we faced the unspoken expectation to be obedient, sweet, easy going- unable to say no, do our own thing or question anything. We then end up equating their harshness and expectations with Islam, sometimes without even realizing it. Sunday school does not help either. Often we are told “do this, or Allah is going to be mad at you.”
  
  
• Therapy: As adults, we try to fix what we sense is amiss through popular approaches like therapy, but it does not solve the emptiness. Therapy soothes the past, but without a spiritual reframe, the emptiness returns.
  
  

HOW TO FIX IT 

We begin by changing the mind of the person we spend the most time with: ourselves. 

We are always in dialogue with our own mind. How and what we think are the most powerful elements that impact our life. Our thinking influences how we see the world, what we pay attention to, what we feel, and how we behave. If we want to make any change or improvement to our life, we must first start by examining our thoughts.

The crucial areas where we need the right mindset are how we view Allah, ourselves, and others. The positive mindset is:

• View of Allah: Allah wants what is best for us. He is on our side and wants us to achieve and have worldly success in addition to success in the hereafter. Moreover, He will help us achieve that success. Before your next prayer, tell yourself: “Allah wants good for me.” Breathe twice. Then begin.
  
  
• View of ourselves: We are good. We are God’s creation, blessed with innumerable gifts and tremendous capacity. Any of our shortcomings, mistakes, or flaws do not diminish our divine nature or disqualify us from receiving God’s bounty and mercy. Write three gifts you’ve been given, and choose one to focus on today.
  
  
• View of others: Others are good. Believe that others are as understanding, considerate, and open-minded as you. Perceive others’ actions and words positively. Any hate that is directed at you is a reflection of that person’s feelings and insecurities about themselves.
  
  

When we hold this positive mindset, we understand, with certainty, that our life is a divine gift. We become able to see the opportunities and possibilities that are available to us everywhere we look.

DON’T FORGET TO CHECK YOUR INBOX TOMORROW!

Phew! We covered a lot today. Consider this your sign to stop and breath, you deserve to recenter for the radical honesty you faced. 

Stay tuned for tomorrow, we will cover Mistake#2:  Blocking Blessings Even After You Pray 

Specifically:

• The reason professional women deflect gifts, help, and even      answered du’as. 
• How that turns du’as into lip service instead of lived experience. 
• The shifts that let you actually receive without guilt or second-guessing 

Keep your eye on your inbox!

With love,

Zahra

P.S. A resource to help you with your mindset and connecting to Allah:

Free Islamic Affirmations